SPANDEX's Return

(part the eleventh)

As they approached, blunt instruments in hand, I had to think my way out of this situation. It was obvious that they were either my friends mad over some money I owed them, or they were demons. Assuming they were my friends gets me nowhere, so assume that they are demons. If they are then everything they say is suspect... including the idea that I could be cut off from SPANDEX.

I blew my Goldfish Whistle TM. This was one of my more important inventions. In the same manner that a dog whistle makes a noise that can only be heard by creatures that can hear high frequencies, my Goldfish Whistle TM makes a noise that only can be heard underwater.

There was a huge explosion. I found myself alone in a field with the ZZYZXmobile. The sound of a plane overhead caused me to look up. The pilot had just finished his skywriting mission and I could read "SPANDEX HELPS THOSE WHO HELP THEMSELVES" in white smoke. Was this a compliment or a warning? Thinking about this would keep me busy on my ride.

Another thing I wanted to reflect on happened right before I went into the building. I heard TOTOA's voice from the loudspeakers, but was it really him? Or, like the other beings there, was he a demon. What do you think?

I was tired after my long day, so I started to set the ZZYZXcontrol. However I remembered how easily it was overcome so I decided I better find a place where I could lay my head. The explosion might make hotels reluctant to take in guests in the holy SPANDEXian garb; in many areas the populace believed the crude propraganda that cults tried to spread about us. I found a rest stop in Kansas, leaned my seat back, and fell asleep.

I woke to the sound of tanks. The design on them was a swastika. In the middle the symbol was a goldfish with a long white beard. That could only mean one thing. PANDEX the OLDFISH had finally managed to escape from his dimension. He was out to capture this one and only I could stop him.


This story is copyright 1996 by David Steinberg and may be distributed freely as long as this cute little note is attached.

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